“But the fruit of the Spirit is … forbearance…” – Galatians 5:22, NIV

Sometime back, I embarked on the difficult task of finding out the greatest virtues in human relations.

What I found surprised me to a certain extent. I mean I had no idea that forbearance is regarded as one of the greatest of virtues for successful personal relationships.

The dictionary definition of the word ‘forbear’ makes this even clearer.

It means to hold oneself back; to control oneself when provoked; to prevent oneself from saying or doing something, especially in a way that shows control, good judgment, or kindness.

If you forbear to do something, you do not do it although you have the opportunity or the right to do it.

In simple terms, forbearance is the act of refraining from the enforcement of a right, an obligation, a demand, a claim, or power on someone.

In the Hebrew, one of the meanings of ‘forbear’ is ‘to spare another.’

In the Greek, the word used for ‘forbear’ means to hold oneself back, to loosen the grip on someone; to keep on sparing someone; to delay punishment; to protect by covering.

With that background, it is easy to see why forbearance is a divine virtue.

Forbearance covers the faults and weaknesses of others.             

Forbearance helps us maintain inner peace and balance in the face of provocation and annoyance.

In the NIV translation of today’s meditation on the ‘fruit of the Holy Spirit’ (Galatians 5:22), ‘forbearance’ is used instead of ‘longsuffering’ – the quality of self-restraint in the face of provocation especially when one has the right to retaliate or punish the offender.

In today’s world, people are extremely irritable, peevish and prone to being offended over almost anything however trial.  

As spouses, we’re ever so petulant, touchy and prone to all sorts of mood swings over every little word or act.

As team members at work, we face the temptation to fight and argue over trifles; to build mountains out of anthills; to make storms in a teacup. 

We forcefully agitate and push for our ‘rights’ and entitlements in regard to how we must be treated by others.

“Bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another.”

COLOSSIANS 3:13

We shun those we don’t agree with and lock out those who offend us or who have weaknesses that we ‘just won’t tolerate.’

“I am just being human,” we reason.

And that’s exactly why forbearance is listed as part of the “fruit of the Holy Spirit.”

As a matter of fact, forbearance is a major aspect of God’s divine character.

God is forbearing and patient towards people (see Romans 2:4, 25)..

Our Lord Jesus exhibited lots of forbearance to everyone He encountered, including those who opposed Him.

I mean He could have used His awesome power to ‘sort them out.’

But He instead chose forbearance with all people, including those who stripped Him naked and crucified Him.

When we stay in tune with the Holy Spirit, we will be able to grow into His character as well, and it will be for our own good, those around us and our world in general.

Colossians 3:13 admonishes: “Bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another.”

Clearly, in a broken and imperfect world, forbearance is the sum total of all human virtues.

Forbearance is the ultimate manifestation of true love and character.

Consequently, forbearance is the virtue that would enable us to thrive in any environment, however hostile.

As team members or bosses or employees, we would work harmoniously, regardless of the imperfections and shortcomings.

Forbearance is what enables two imperfect people to live together for decades.  There’s no other magic about it. 

Without forbearance, there can’t be grace, or peace or growth.  Clearly, our world could do with a little more forbearance.

To what extent are you willing to allow the Holy Spirit to cultivate the virtue of forbearance in your life?

Prayer:

Almighty God, thank You for Your forbearance towards me. Where I deserved punishment and condemnation, I’ve experienced Your extreme forbearance, mercy and patience. Help me to grow into that same character with those around me. For the glory of Your Name, Amen!